The 2024 film Space Cadet feels like I Love Lucy and Hallmark made a film where she, Lucy, goes to space. Not particularly as G rated as the old Lucy shows, this one does at least come out as a low PG.
The story
Young Rex only has eyes for space. She is a good student and gets a “free ride” to college. However, her mum dies, and she has to look after her dad. The ride runs out and she becomes a bartender and alligator wrestler.
A space agency advertises for astronauts. Something Rex has dreamed about forever. She applies.
The Main Cast
Emma Roberts is Rex; girl with a dream.
Tom Hopper is Logan, the new “dream” of Rex. Tall, “British and glasses. “
Gabrielle Union is Logan’s counterpart at the space agency.
Poppy Liu is Nadine.
Desi Lydic is Dr Stacy Kellog. *If awards were given out for Kim Cattrall look-alikes she would win, hands down.*
Kuhoo Verma is Violet, an astronaut wanna be with more problems than Carter has little pills.
Dave Foley is Rudolph Bolton. What can we say? It’s Dave Foley. Nuff said.
Grain of salt
The entire plot of this film beggars belief. Never mind that Roberts’ character is too “out there” to be a real astronaut recruit. It really requires that the viewer be high, or at the very least drunk, to find this film entertaining.
Space Cadet utilizes a plot that really exemplifies the Hallmark signature. Simplistic plot meets earnest portrayals of unrealistic characters. In other words every romantic or Christmas tale ever aired on the Hallmark channel.
Old ladies and spinsters may love these types of scenarios but folks who do not fall into these categories are going to laugh in all the wrong places. They may well groan at the unrealistic plight of the lead characters.
Teenage Dirtbag baby?
Roberts’ character is like a 2024 Florida version of a over aged “Teenage Dirtbag Baby.” Rex’s life has not been a bowl of cherries though. Her stunted growth is more visual than visceral. Deep inside she knows that, given the chance, she can make a difference.
This is the only “real” message the film has to offer. Everything outside this premise is just full on fantasy. If we treat it as such, there are a few chuckles to be had.
Very few.
Better Luck Next Time
Writer/director Liz W. Garcia struck out this time at bat. She depended on the audience being able to suspend their disbelief for a very long time. An entire run time of 1 hour and 50 minutes, to be exact.
Just not sustainable. Sorry.
the verdict
This is a wavering 2 stars out of 5. I really wanted to like this one. I adore Emma Roberts and admire Tom Hopper. However. Even they could not save this ridiculous concept for a movie. Space Cadet is streaming on Prime.
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