I seem to be suffering from a combination of ADHD of the brain and a curious type of lethargy. How the two can co-exist in the same grey mass of brain is puzzling and not a little irritating.
I have thought processes that slowly start to work and wham! The thought that was creakily making it’s way to the front of my mind, hops off into a different direction. Before it can land though, it will skip sideways and then shimmy off to the left. Aha! I think, I’ve got you now. Only to have it jump off into another area altogether and in doing so, causes another thought process to germinate.
It appears that, today at least, I am incapable of grabbing a single idea and riding it to a satisfactory destination. The ADHD part of my brain is finding it impossible to hold still while the thought or idea is forming. It is sort of like taking out a bowl of Jell0 before it’s ready and finding yourself looking at a semi-congealed mess.
Normally, I can juggle several ‘half-started’ ideas at once. I can then control which idea I want to hop on or skip. I can also shimmy a bit to the left or right of the idea and either choose to stay with that one or to jump to another idea. However it winds up, I am usually in control.
Or at least I think I am in control. That might just be an illusion caused by my believing that I am in charge of my shotgun pattern of synapses.
I can always try to make myself feel more important by thinking, Yep got too many irons in the fire. Of course the reality is, I have no irons in the fire, not one. I don’t even really think I have a fire to put an iron in.
Oh well, until I can catch a proper thought or idea, I’ll just stay here and let my mind scuttle and scurry like a mouse on speed. A metaphorical Speedy Gonzales that is zooming from brain cell to brain cell.
Hopefully tomorrow when I wake up in the morning my brain will have relaxed into a more Slow-poke Rodriguez rhythm. That way I can actually grab an idea and see it to a discernible end.
Until then, it’s ándele, ándele, arriba!
- How to Become More Optimistic (Book Review) (ftheeiwasateenagequaker.wordpress.com)