Chelsea: Lea Michele Naked on Broadway

Chelsea Handler on Netflix

Chelsea managed to keep the political portion of the show down to a minimum as Ms. Handler paid tribute to the “soon-to-be-departing” president and his family.  She also pointed out Michelle Obama’s impressive guns.

The highlight of this episode was definitely Lea Michele, although Plaschke and Miller, both Reggie and T.J. were a close second. The former Glee star and regular on FOX’s Scream Queens was a brilliant first guest.

She was on the show  principally to plug her second season appearance on Scream Queens.  Lea talked about getting naked in front of Chelsea.  They also talked about her nude cover for the UK edition of Women’s Health.

Chelsea congratulated her on the cover, where she shows a bit of side-boob and her bare bum, and Lea talked about how easy the shoot was.  Although she did admit that appearing naked on the cover was not thought through very well.

She was relaxed on the photo shoot and explained that she had been naked on Broadway. The actress spoke of zeroing in on audience members who looked uncomfortable with her nudity.

Michele also revealed that for the session she did not put a pasty over her “pikachu.” Chelsea explained that she would never feel comfortable enough to bare her pikachu. Talking about going to the beach, she explained about sand and Lea agreed.

After talking about partying and that Lea seems to be a “goody-two-shoes” they moved on to talk about Scream Queens.  Chelsea revealed that co-star Taylor Lautner will be on the show later on and about John Stamos not aging.

Lea told stories about working with men who have to take their shirts off and how they frantically diet before hand.   Michele then moved on to the insecurity of men, “especially if they have weird d*cks.”

The interview finished with mutual admiration from both women and Lea praised Chelsea’s “t*ts. Michele jokingly said she had the chest of a 12 year old boy.

Next up was Seymour, Chelsea’s father. He asked when she was going to have  a baby.

Sports was represented by Reggie Miller and sports journalist for the LA Times Bill Plaschke. The two men were a brilliant double act.  Despite Lea Michele being a hard act to follow, both men gave good interview.

The subject of Colin Kaepernick came up and Reggie, an Air Force “brat” and he professed that he is 100 percent Team Kaepernick.  After  Chelsea throws a magazine at Bill, they moved on to most valuable player in  women’s basketball and Reggie’s sister Cheryl Miller beating him regularly at one-on-one.

Finally, T.J. Miller arrived in a dog suit, which seemed to  have two tails, and Chelsea introduced the actor as a polymath.  Miller seemed to be somewhat distracted before they played a game where Chelsea asked him trivia questions.

Miller’s portion was entertaining and he trotted out facts that impressed the audience and Chelsea.

This was an impressive episode. Every single guest delivered in terms of being amusing, with the possible exception of Bill.  (Chelsea did describe the man as being the most unfunny person in the world.)

Lea Michele set the tone of the show and all the other guests stepped up their game.  Laura Wasser appeared to explain what “off the record” means in the “Know Your Rights” segment.

Chelsea airs Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays on Netflix.

Guests:

Scream Queens: Ghost Stories (Review)

Scream Queens: Ghost Stories reaches a pinnacle with its homage riffs when using the water device from Kill Bill Vol. l (the one in the Lucy Lui and Uma Thurman duel in)

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Scream Queens: Ghost Stories reaches a pinnacle with its homage riffs when using the water device from Kill Bill Vol. l (the one in the Lucy Lui and Uma Thurman duel) not once but twice, as Denise Hemphill tells two Japanese ghost stories set in the bathroom.  This episode marks the first time that Hemphill (Niecy Nash) has scored a “win” with this viewer, although it was disappointing to see the most annoying character of the series still living at the end of the episode. 

(Never has the sight of red and blue toilet paper – red equals throat slit and blue equals strangling – evoked such euphoria…)

Chanel #3 (Billie Lourd) sees “dead gay Boone” sans his Joaquin Phoenix disguise and tells the rest of the Chanel’s that he is haunting her. This prompts Hemphill to tell ghost stories, two of which are Japanese with one called “The Kappa” (which is a play on words…get it?) and one tale features the red roll of toilet paper and the blue one.  The other has a hand reaching up from the toilet and grabbing the person on the convenience and dragging them into the sewers to die. 

Ghost story gags aside, the body count is quite high, Earl Grey buys it, Hester, aka Chanel # 6, aka Lea Michele, dies and dead gay Boone is killed for real this time.  (It has to be said that the “dead gay Boone” thing was funny and one kept expecting the follow-on of “Say that fast three times” to turn up.)

By the end the show, Chanel Oberlin (Emma Roberts)  has claimed her second victim. She boots Hester down the stairs and the neck-brace girl lands at the bottom with a subtle neck crunching sound While Ms. Bean (the cook Chanel kills by frying her face off) may have been accidental, Chanel # 6 was definitely on purpose. 

Gigi is shown, again,  to be the “mastermind” behind the red devils and Boone one-half of the twins born that fateful night,  from the death seen at the start of the series. Dean Munsch (Jamie Lee Curtis) confirms that two babies were born that night. Gigi almost gets taken out of the equation by “not-dead” gay Boone but his twin stabs him instead.  

Missing from this episode were Grace’s dad Wes (Oliver Hudson) and Pete (Diego Boneta) which begs the question: Are they the other murderous team? 

Gigi mentions in another episode that there is another murderer, or murderers,  “competing” with their death/revenge spree.  The last red devil,  the “sibling” who murdered Boone, is still unidentified and could well be Pete, or an as yet unidentified female from Kappa, like Chanel #5, with her toothy vagina…

Wes Gardner is odd enough to be a suspect as a player on the other “team”  although it is pretty apparent that Dean Munsch is at least a murderous partner of the other serial killer team running around on campus. So she and Wes could be killing to their own agenda…

In terms of comedy/horror Scream Queens rocks it out of the park each week.  Ryan Murphy, Iain Brennan and Brad Falchuk have come up with a cast of characters who are all nitwits of the finest order.  While some are more devious than others, the average brain power of each one, if combined with all the other characters on the show, could not think their way out of a damp paper bag.

It is this combination of challenged intellect and vacuous self centered narcissism to the nth degree that makes the characters so funny. This also allows the creators free reign on plot twists, homages, full-on slap-stick and bad puns.

Line of the episode: 

Gigi: “Boone… you are… the weakest link.”

Scream Queens is addictively funny and worth every laugh filled minute. The series airs Tuesdays on FOX and is a delicious treat from the team that brought the world Glee and American Horror Story.

Scream Queens: Seven Minutes in Hell (Review)

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Before looking at the humor in Scream Queens, Seven Minutes in Hell, there a a few holes to look into (and no, despite a show that wallows in double and triple  entendres that is not another one) while chuckling at the “Someone always goes lez” line that is so politically incorrect.  The news is that the Ryan Murphy co-creation is steadily dropping in ratings and this could be down to viewers taking the show too seriously.

Example: Those pesky holes, aka plot holes, aka “wtf” moments.

In this episode, all the Kappa gals are trapped in the house. All windows and doors are locked, via a panic system; a’la Panic Room, when suddenly the power goes out.  As anyone knows  (Well, anyone who watches technical thrillers, Die Hard,  or even CBS’s Scorpion.) when the power goes out all electric powered locks go down. The house, once the power went off should have been “wide open.”

This was ignored however, just as after Chad comes over to break into the “locked” house by breaking a second story window,  he requests that his smart phone be hooked up to the sorority house speakers to jam some hot music and the group all dance to said music.

Hello? No power? Speakers need electricity…

And last, but not least in the blazingly obvious stakes, there is the broken window on the second floor where a few knotted sheets could have rendered everyone safe-ish.  Chanel, however, repeatedly states that they are all still trapped in the house (where the doors must now be open with the electric off) and recommends that they use the hidden tunnels to escape.

There were a number of other “holes” in the episode, but to be honest?

Who cares?

This was a fun episode and a chance for almost every “sister” to be funny as hell. Chanel #3 (Billie Lourd) gets to pile on the comedy, with her wildly unplayed performance, and the entire exchange between Sam (Jeanna Han) and Lourd’s character is hysterical.  Sadly, Sam dies in the bathtub in the storage room. (Which points out another hole, 5 gives the gay pledge the key which was given to ZayDay (Keke Palmer) moments earlier in the episode.

Still, despite all the boo-boos in the show, how can one not love a series where Emma Roberts’ character admits to watching documentaries on A&E about the Mafia as a survival tool.   Or hosts a slumber party, suggested by new co-president Williams, where “someone always experiments with lesbianism and a serial killer strikes,”  which featured a “spin-the-bottle” game despite there being no guys there and Chanel #1 clearly did not get it.

Sam does, although she does not get a chance to benefit from 5’s experimental smooch too much before being snuffed out in the tub later. Something that Chanel numero five is responsible for.

The Red Devil, despite its mask looking an awful lot like Jamie Lee Curtis’ Dean Munsch, may turn out to be Gigi and/or Denise since that were the only two character’s not seen.  Disregarding Pete’s not being there either since someone in the cast brought that up so it must be a red herring. However, Wes; Grace’s dad, only shows up at the end of the episode. After threatening to throw his daughter over his shoulder and carrying her out, daddy leaves empty shouldered.

With the masculine chest plate of the Red Devil, at least one of the two killers must be a bloke, although the man’s pectoral plastic molding is not the only “clue” to the killers gender. In the tunnel scene the killer comes at Chanel and ZayDay with an axe in each hand. At the risk of sounding sexist, there are not many women who could weld two heavy duty cutting implements that easily.

*Sidenote* In this episode it is revealed why Chanel #3 wears those earmuffs, which, apart from making her look cute, does look a little odd.  Cute ear coverings aside, it is also revealed that her fear of being accused of being the serial killer after everyone learns that her dad is Charles Mansion, was not unfounded. Although to be fair, only Chad reacted to the news.

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The body count, by the end of the episode, was three. Sam, who manages to a) see the killer’s face and b) reveals that she knew “it was you.” The second casualty was the poor frat lad who had his arms chopped off earlier.   Third was the last half of the Roger/Dodger twin set who buys it after being shot with a red (color-coordinated) nailer apparently with huge amount of nails in it.

Another of the funnier moments was Chad, who after “building up of his armless Dickie Dollar brother” deserts the poor guy when the killer turns up.  Just as amusing was Chanel #1 picking on poor #5. The “vagina with teeth” gag was so cruelly funny and a perfect indicator of Roberts’ character’s childish nastiness.

Lea Michele’s character is still vying for the creepiest girl in the house trophy and all the characters, except for Grace, are still vacuous airheads.  The combination of shallow self centered characters and a slew of horror film references still works brilliantly:

Chanel Oberlin: “That means the killer is still in the house!”

Farty McCandles: “Oh God, has someone checked on the kids?”

The clear reference to the 1978 Carol Kane film When a Stranger Calls  is just one of many nods and winks to iconic horror films  in the series.

It is not clear just why numbers are dropping. This show is special funny. Glee goes to American Horror Story funny, and without all the annoying High School Musical singing and dancing or Lady Gaga.

Scream Queens is anti-PC, irreverent and funny. As stated before, it is National Lampoon’s Animal House married to Sorority Row. Sit back and enjoy it.  This is hilarity with little semblance to reality and despite hints that Denise Hemphill is not dead, well worth watching. The show airs Tuesdays on FOX.

Scream Queens: Chainsaw OTT Fun Continues (Review)

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The pilot of Scream Queens last week started off the over the top (OTT) fun with Ariana Grande’s character, Chanel #2,  tweeting about being murdered by the Red Devil.  Something that Denise Hemphill brings up later in the second episode and then the scene follows up with a gag about Instagram and an obviously dead Chanel #2 posting to the social network.

Chainsaw, the second episode of the Ryan Murphy, Ian Brennan, Brad Falchuk project,  is apparently Brennan’s baby, written and directed by, and he has obviously channelled his inner Wayans’ and Zucker’s into this installment. The first look at the series, in the pilot, contained a lot of Scary Movie type humor, but now the show has shifted into overdrive with its clear homage to all things Animal House as well as the more comical side of every sorority house slasher ever made.

Emma Roberts continues to slay her role as Chanel #1, aka Chanel Oberlin (“Hello Idiot Hookers”) who manages to make every insult that comes from her mouth hysterically funny. The actress can literally deliver the goods with each gem that spills from her vitriolic lips. The makeover prelude with Lea Michele is brilliant.

Speaking of Lea Michele…the whole makeover scene is her baby. While Roberts starts off as the lead, Michele as the new Chanel #6 steals the entire set piece. Looking beyond stunning after coming down the stairs, one of the girls tells the pledge how great she looks. Hester (Michele) replies that she is in agony without her brace but it is worth it; all delivered between gritted teeth shaped into a smile. Brilliant.

In this installment, Denise Hemphil (Niecy Nash) continues to play the female version of Marlon Wayans’ character in Scary Movie, without the drug intake. Her lines throughout the series thus far are funny but one winces while laughing wondering when the PC police are going to strike.

Abigail Breslin has completely left her Little Miss Sunshine and Zombieland days behind her. The scene between Chanel #5 (Breslin) and Roberts is eyeopening and also requires a bit of wincing. Realizing that the young lady who is boasting of being “Eiffel Towered” is the same one who competes in the talent  contest in “Sunshine” is a little disturbing…but still so funny.

There are so many sexual innuendos that one can easily lose count. One of the best has to be the Chanel #3 (Billie Lourd) line, “Cause munching box is what killed Michael Douglas…” (Note, Douglas is not dead for those who may have just panicked a little.) Later #3 comes out with a line that has nothing to do with sex but is still memorable. Discussing her family lineage she says to Sam (Jeanna Han) “You know Swenson? Swenson the frozen dinners, like Swanson’s for poor people…”

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Chad in The Warriors, A Clockwork Orange, West Side Story, boy band scene…

There are so many comic moments that it is hard to keep track. The whole The Warriors thing with Chad and his frat boys carrying bats and calling out the Red Devil but looking like A Clockwork Orange with their cricket whites on. Grace’s dad showing the film analysis class the Tobe Hooper 1974 original classic The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and his strange rambling summation of the film’s ending after.

Also the completely random but, oh so funny, battle between Coney the new mascot and the Red Devil after Aaron Cohen’s off screen monologue about how great it is being Coney and how he is never taking the costume off.

Back to Cody’s baseball bat carrying friends and their moment in the street against the two killers…Was that a riff on the 1975 Monty Python and the Holy Grail?  The “Come back and fight scene?” Answers in the comments please, or on a post card if you are over a certain age…

Scream Queens not only takes on all things from the slasher genre and makes over the top fun of it but also includes as many pop culture references as possible. Even the cast are culturally relevant. Ariana Grande,  Jamie Lee Curtis, and KeKe Palmer (one of the busiest young performers in the business apparently) are an example of the awareness of the casting directors and the show’s producers.

*Sidenote* How many folks instantly hear that YouTube kid’s song (Jenna Rose “My Jeans.”) when they see Palmer on screen? You know the one, “KeKe Palmer is wearing my jeans.” Never heard of the actress till that song…

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Wes, Grace’s dad, presents the best movie ever…

Back to the show, Curtis is still knocking it out of the park even when the dialogue and the action enter and  then go beyond ridiculous. The whole white noise gag bordered on idiocy yet both actresses managed to play it straight which made it work…after a fashion. A little too OTT chaps…just saying.

The show is still working though. The bit of almost Airplane! dialogue between Grace and ZayDay (Palmer) at the start :

“You want to put syrup on chips? You can’t be serious, right?”

“Yes, I’m serious.”

“You’re insane.”

Everything about episode two screams comedy. Dean Munsch’s  “Take back the night” speech and (disregarding the comedic Barfman and kelp in ice cream gag) Lea Michele’s character Hester’s rapt look while listening to the dean. Michele pretty much owned this installment on the sorority sister side. Watch that scene and you will see why.

The taser in the “nuts” gag, the chainsaw under ZayDay’s bed, the frat boy street battle…Chainsaw shoved comedy up front and slipped the horror under the bed with Williams’s granny’s protection present.

Charisma Carpenter (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel) and Roger Bart (Desperate Housewives, The Producers) as Ariana Grande’s Chanel #2’s parents worked brilliantly for obvious reasons.

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Roger Bart and Charisma Carpenter…

All in all,  Scream Queens still manages to deliver in the comedy stakes even if horror took a reluctant backseat in Chainsaw. The show airs Tuesdays on FOX. Tune in to learn the latest slang words for sexual acts and non pc humor and to laugh uncontrollably.

 

Cory Monteith’s Final Glee Episode: So Long Finn

Cory Monteith’s Final Glee Episode: So Long Finn

Cory Monteith’s tragic overdose of heroin and alcohol in a deserted Vancouver hotel room threw Hollywood into a maelstrom of shock and grief. Producers of the popular Fox Network television show, Glee, were caught in a difficult position.

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