I wanted a nice “eye-catching” title for my post today. After battling with myself for all of two minutes, I decided not to use the Life after Death title I wanted. Because, although I was technically “dead” while they operation on me for hours, I wasn’t really dead.
At least, I don’t think so.
I mean, I did not see a white light; get visited by old dear dead relatives; receive any messages from beyond and I did not have any earth shattering visions. I was a little disappointed.
But then, I felt the same three years ago when they pumped me full of radioactive gunk and ran tests on me. I sort of hoped that I’d get some sort of super power, like Spiderman or even Dr Doom. (I know he’s a bad guy, okay?)
I have mentioned that before I was checked out of the hospital early (the staff and the doctors/surgeons were amazed that I’d “recovered” in 4 days) the cardiologist gave me a “pep” talk.
Said talk consisted of me suddenly realising one day that I’d almost died and that I would react, most probably, badly to it.
Hasn’t happened.
Yet.
But I have changed. No doubt about it. I’m different.
I could not have told you why either. Not until the other day at least.
I’ve finally been allowed to attend cardiology rehabilitation. I won’t go into the reasons why I’ve had to wait for over six months after the heart attack and two surgeries to attend. I’ve written about it all before. At my first “rehab” appointment I was given a questionnaire to fill in. Very much like the one I’d filled in on my first visit to my local GP after I got home from the hospital.
It asks lots of questions about how you feel.
Do you worry? Are you stressed? And so on.
One question towards the end jumped off the page at me.
Do you feel like you are in a hurry or like there is not enough time?
Bingo!
That is exactly how I feel.
I’ve been rushing around trying to do so many things; mainly because I’m afraid if I don’t, I’ll never get anything accomplished.
It has dawned on me that I’ve spent the vast majority of my life not doing the things I was passionate about or even enjoyed doing.
My “too close for comfort” brush against the big guy with the scythe and hood made me realise it was time to stop futzing around. I then jumped back into the writing of my blog with almost manic energy (after I’d started feeling like I really was alive after all) and then took stock.
At the end of that stock take, I’d made up my mind. Try everything that you’ve wanted to do for years; things that, damn it, you were good at. Writing and acting leapt to the front of the queue.
I am writing (a bit more sedately as I’m having to share my output) my blog, of course, but I’m also writing for Rogue Cinema. I’ve gotten my first freelance job, I’ve applied to The New Yorker Times, I’ve been accepted by What Culture and I’ll be acting for the first time in years around June/July this year. I am also, starting on May 16th, a host for Tomorrow Comes Media.
I am also up to chapter 7 of my book and I’m still sorting out ideas for more short stories for my collection.
I’m also researching, reading and discovering new authors and films. All these are just on the creative side of my life.
I’ve found that I can also take care of my house, garden, exercise, cook and try to get on top of my financial crisis.
Life is, at the moment, pretty damned sweet.
It is also busy.
So life after almost dying is good and, it has to be said, much better than the alternative.
Related articles
- The Top 5 Regrets of The Dying (collective-evolution.com)
- Five Randomly Useful Hot Tips About Dying (acuriouscure.com)
Thanks! Your support is more appreciated than you can know! Yeah, breathing, good stuff that! 😀
I also applaude your attitude and your just bursting with a new lease of life now. Great post Mike, and all the best for the film and everything else you pack in, oh and keep breathing it’s good for you:)
Awww! Thanks! I’m really excited to be in front of the camera again after all these years….I’m also bloody terrified! LOL 😮
I applaud your attitude. I am sorry that you had to deal with a serious health issue, but I think you couldn’t have come out of it with any better outlook on life. I am glad things are going well for you, and I look forward to watching your performance in Natasha’s film, as well as reading your book when it comes out.
AS mentioned in the post, I saw nada, zip, zero and remember less than nothing. I think having your heart stopped for the duration of the long surgery must not count as “dying.” LOL 🙂
Life is so much more interesting when you live soul-fully. Glad you found your passions in life…your ‘awakening’ almost makes the near death experience worthwhile! What do you think? Would like to hear more about your NDE…what do you remember and what did you see???
Yup, the weirder the character, the better, in my opinion.
Thanks mate! Yeah, I know what you mean about writing. I always feel so creative. Writing things that interest me and creating characters that excite me makes the whole process worthwhile. 😀
It is amazing how people “read” the phrase ‘the big guy’ as we both got completely different visions in our heads. I was referring to Death and you immediately thought of God. Based on our similar but different experiences, you obviously hear from Him and I did not…
But then again, He could have been saying something quite important or life changing (pun) but I was too concerned with the pain and the drugs to notice!
I try to remember to breathe every day! LOL 😉
Great input as always! Thanks mate!
Great post, my friend. It’s great to see you doing so many awesome things. I’ve been trying to get back to writing, I started writing my first screenplay. There’s something about writing that makes you feel so…epic. I don’t know, creating characters and situations is always fun. 😀
Also, cool to see you writing for Rogue. One of my reviews is published on there, but there are so many great reviews there, like yours. 🙂
Not being dead has much to recommend it. Just emember to breathe. One of the things we never did enough of before was NOT rush. We’ve been hurrying our entire lives. I have had that chat with the Big Guy. Actually, he did all the talking. I got to say one word, once. it happened twice, the first time almost 50 years ago, the last (time) 6 years ago. I still don’t know what to make of it. It turns out believing in God does not make one religious. How odd.
Me too mate, me too! 😀
Mike, Life IS good. Glad you are here!
😀
No worries 😀
Hey! Thanks for the reblog!!! 😀
Awww! Thanks mate!! 😀
Reblogged this on Films and Things.
Great post 😀
You’re a bit of an inspiration really aren’t you! Things are going well and you deserve it 😀 hope they continue that way! Just don’t forget me when you’re a famous writer *sniff* 😛
And I’m very glad that you’re back into acting, as it were…can’t think of anyone better to be my ‘protag’ 😀