Life through my myopic eyes.

I Knew There Was Something Going On


The BBC News Magazine put this on their page today - A “super breed” of slugs has arrived from Spain, but are they a threat to the UK’s native slugs?

I knew there was something going on here. I’ve noticed that our back garden has been covered in slugs over the last few days. I am not talking about five or ten, I’m talking an amount of slugs that is reaching Biblical proportions.

I mentioned this to my daughter. “You always exaggerate.” This was said while she edited her latest video.  ”The amount of slugs and snails goes up when it rains. You know that.” All this was said in a very calm “voice of reason” tone.

“Not like these.” I said. I was standing at my French doors looking into a garden covered with the slimy things. I stopped counting after twenty. And these puppies were huge.

The BBC article said they grew up to ten centimetres. I had to convert this via the net as I grew up in an inches and feet generation. So in real terms of measurement that is about four inches long!

So according to the article these monster Spanish slugs are a threat to the UK slug. My first reaction, well besides the I knew part, was good. Anything that gets rid of any slugs is a good thing surely.

But further reading, combined with my personal sightings of the disgusting creatures, gave me cause for concern. These Spanish ‘stealth’ slugs can out breed the English slug by a lot. The stealth slug reproduce “aggressively” pumping out about four hundred eggs per cycle.

Slugs, the article helpfully informs us, are cannibals. So the rapidly reproducing stealth slug is also introducing diseases and bacteria that is lethal the the UK slug. So not only are the Spanish slugs killing our slugs, but they are feeding on them as well. No wonder their numbers are growing.

The article also helpfully points out that as slugs are cannibalistic as their numbers increase they can cause road traffic accidents. How? Well so many of them cross the road that the surface gets slimy and cars lose traction.

Supposedly Norway has had a similar problem with the Spanish slug as well.

I’ve been looking out at my back garden this morning and checking to see if any more slugs have appeared. They seem to hide when the sun comes out, so it is difficult to see if the population has increased.

I working on a plan of action. I seem to remember my Grandmother telling me that salt gets rid of slugs. I might just give that a go. But I’m a little worried.

The Spanish slugs are so big, I’m afraid they might just be able to defend themselves. Hell, they could even attack when threatened.

If you don’t hear from me again, you’ll know they got me.

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Categorised in: Autobiography, Comedy, Personal, Reflective, Uncategorized

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